Welcome To The All-New* ANBAD!

My God! It’s full of stars!” – Opening line from the movie 2010

Poor old Dave Bowman. 2010 isn’t full of stars at all, just the same old crud from the Noughties, but with slightly cooler-looking dates, and less ready money.

But wait! Here’s the All-New* A New Band A Day to make a tangible difference to the world as we know it.

The clunky old ANBAD has finally been confined to the Great Internet Dustbin Of Pity and behold: the new ANBAD is here, and it finally looks a little bit like a real website, at last.

But wait! There’s more – marvel at the menu bar in the middle of the site and notice that there is now a bit more than just a great new band every day. There’ll be new interviews with the best new bands, so you can hear from the bands themselves; new features on new music from new writers, so yu can hear the thoughts of bright young writers; new insight from local scenes all over the world, so you can hear what’s happening on the other side of the world; and – finally – new radio shows highlighting great new music. And yes, we are getting paid each time the word ‘new’ is written in bold.

As of today, there’s an article featuring a bizarre Melbourne dance phenomenon, another article about why we’re wrong and Tim Westwood is right, interviews with Forest Fire and Nic Dawson Kelly, and a radio-show round-up of December’s Top Five New Bands. Click the tabs for more.

So, mooch around and see what you think. You can subscribe to ANBAD here. And if you have any feedback, please let me know!

I hope you enjoy the new ANBAD! (Or should that be NANBAD?)

Joe Sparrow//Manchester//Jan ’10

*almost totally the same as before

>King Kayak, Cliff Richard and Christmas Sneers

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The Christmas Top 10, in the UK at least, used to be a fun cobbling-together of novelty seasonal songs, re-releases of novelty seasonal songs, and Cliff Richard records; the Christmas Number One slot was genuinely coveted, in a slightly camp way.

Now, since Simon Cowell became the pantomime mogul-dame of music-reality TV, his endless string of recent-wannabes have filled this spot each year with one drab song after another. But now the Internets are fighting back, with an organised campaign to get Rage Against The Machine‘s Killing In The Name Of to the top this year instead.

Wait – is this some sort of obscure joke? Is this Post-Post-Irony? Telling people to buy a song that has “Fuck you, I won’t do what you tell me” as its most memorable line is the pop equivalent of a snake eating its own tail.

Just think of all the money that will be wasted on an internet meme that could be nudged towards new bands instead – bands like King Kayak, who would welcome the cash a lot more readily than Zack de la Rocha.

Thinking about it, King Kayak are well placed most to make a tilt for the Christmas #1 slot – they make breezy songs, benevolently spreading cheer and fun. If they added a few jingling bells and a children’s choir to John, maybe they could do it. It’s bright, carefree and has a pop hook that would mobilise the most reluctant of office party dancefloors.

King Kayak – John

Imagine if it happened. King Kayak, number one. A band succeeding from nowhere with a great song, an amazing story and bundles of talent. You could make a primetime reality TV show out of that.

Photo courtesy of Salford Advertiser

>Etienne Jaumet, and Paul McCartney’s Unusually Chestnut Brown Hair

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I recently read an article claiming that Paul “L’Oreal Chestnut Brown Tint For Men” McCartney wrote The Long And Winding Road for Tom Jones, who then turned it down. Doubtlessly he was too busy struggling in and out of his tight trousers and brushing his chest hair to contemplate hollering a song written by a mere Beatle.

I find that just too hard to believe. OK, The Long And Winding Road is almost unbearably sentimental to listen to without spontaneously vomiting, but still, why would Tom say no?

Most interesting of all is the fact that Macca wrote songs for for others whilst in the Beatles.

But it seems all artists feel the need to spread their abilities, terrified by the prospect of confinement by the group aesthetic. Albeit, in Paul’s case, this confinement would have been from The bloody Beatles, a claustrophobic arrangement most people could probably just about live with.

Etienne Jaumet is one half of the interesting Zombie Zombie, is in a host of other bands, and yet still craves independence. Thankfully, I may add, as his LUST FOR SOLO GLORY has resulted in a cluster of sparse, delicate and addictive electronica.

Entropy is a deliciously restrained, techno shudder that ramps up the tension as it maintains its steady onward trundle. Inevitably, it fizzles and dies before any anticipated bassy explosion.

Etienne Jaumet – Entropy

While minimalism is key to Etienne’s music, he’s also an eclecticist: Madeleine is as a birdwatcher’s audio cast-off, a Commodore 64-obsessive’s record collection and an easy-listening connoisseur’s choice cut, all in one.

Perhaps Etienne Jaumet‘s music is a side-project, something made to pass the time or simply an audio investigation. Like, Whatever: the end result is curious, relaxing, and unexpected, in that order.

>Break Thru Radio Blogger Of The Week! PLUS! In The City Music Conference 2009

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ANBAD isn’t really used to having awards bestowed on it, but be still my beating heart: here on the wonderful Break Thru Radio, ANBAD is Blogger Of The Week!

The delightful Mimi Kim of Break Thru Radio interviewed me and the results are in this show, which, even if I do say so myself, is lovely stuff. I talk about all these things:

  1. Why I write about a new band a day, and why I haven’t gone crazy yet
  2. The bands I’ve liked writing about, and why
  3. Why I get all soppy and weepy when thinking about John Peel
  4. Plans for world domination, enslaving the human race through increasingly mind-grating Flo Rida records

Though one or more of those is a downright lie. Anyway, inbetween my mindless yapping, Mimi plays all sorts of great records of my choice. In case you somehow missed the link: here it is again. It was a great experience – thanks Mimi!

And in other news: I’ve used all my boyish charm and manly good looks (i.e. not much) to sneak into the wonderful, annual In The City new music conference, which is based in Manchester and is The World’s Premiere New Music Event, according to the website. It is just that, I suppose, but in reality is a good excuse to see some ace unsigned bands and drink too much in a drizzly northern city. I’ll report back to you next week.