KID CITY, And The Guaranteed ANBAD Money-Generation Scheme

Hey! Would you like to know how to make big money as a musician? I’ve got the answer, right here. I’ve spoken to a lot of people in the music world, and I’ve got the solution – and it’s a guaranteed, nailed-on, #WINNER! (Sorry, no more Charlie Sheen.)

Ready? No, really, are you ready? Brace yourself. It’s this: be Bon Jovi. That’s it.

Hey, I didn’t say it was easy, or even possible. But it’s still true: Jon Bon & The Crinkly Bunch are one of the very few bands in the world who can still make enough money to live The Rock Life. Everyone else has to make do with juggling rock dreams with part-time office jobs. Sorry.

That said, the current absence of a true money-making stream has led to the implementation of some brilliant ideas.

Old ANBAD favourites Art Brut are trying a quite different approach to cash-generation via Pledge Music, where, yes, you can buy the new Art Brut album, but also – and more excitingly – you can buy your own Art Brut gig, an Art Brut football kit, a Karaoke session with Eddie Argos, and more.

This approach – making all of the fans’ interaction with the band chargeable, like merchandise – is almost certainly the way forward. It’s an approach which new bands like Kid City have been utilising for a while – note the rise of both the Merch Stall, and the imploring from the stage to stop by it on your way out – and it’s a smart move.

Kid City‘s Bloody Face is one of those songs that often gets described as ‘icy’ and ‘crystalline’, often by writers pushed for time (like this one) – but these clichés exist for good reason.

Songs along these lines often sound drab, or boring, or like pale imitations of – shudder – Zero 7. Kid City have taken care to avoid these pitfalls with a combination of Kraftwerkian beat-dollops, leftfield-synth noises and jabbering lyrics that aren’t too serious.

It works well, and if they play their cards right – or simply charge for them – fortune can be theirs, too. Good stuff.


>Today’s New Band – Glam Chops

>Mixing things together is one of those childlike pleasures that never leaves us as we’re drawn, inexorably, towards adulthood. Presented with a table of food, what child doesn’t think, “I wonder what happens if I stir that gravy into that ketchup/mashed potatoes/custard and then taste it?” It seems like only a whole load of good can come from dedicated investigating like this. The truth is somewhat harder to swallow, literally and metophorically, and surely the real reason for the glut of knuckle-chewingly idiotic ‘mash-ups’ that polluted the internet a while ago.

In the non-gravy laden world of rock ‘n’ roll, what happens when two rock asteroids collide? Again, mixed results inevitably ensue. For every wonderful Fairytale of New York, there’s a brain-auto-euthanasia-ing Ebony and Ivory. These collaborations should be approached with extreme caution, or dodged altogether, just in case.

Today’s New Band, Glam Chops, is a meeting of, amongst others, Eddie Argos and David Devant from the lovely Art Brut and the delicious David Devant and His Spirit Wife. Surely nothing can go wrong?

Well, no, nothing can go wrong. Yes, it’s Glam Rock, and no, it’s not changed that much since the 70’s – but that’s only a good thing. Glam Chops lovingly revisit the past, but unlike Marty McFly, don’t muck around with it. Don’t Be Glum Be Glam is just pure, mindless fun – the best kind of all. HUGE guitars, HUGER choruses and chant-along verses VAST enough to climb on and lever the earth out of orbit.

In The Lord Is A Man of War, Glam Chops, frankly, push the basic tenets of glam to it’s mentalist conclusions, with a monster reverb-spazzed guitar solo and guitars so crunchy that they’ve probably been constructed purely from Tortilla Chips.

More fun than hot oil wrestling, more catchy than the airborn Ebola virus from Outbreak and more out of sync with today’s po-faced haircut-rock posturing than Kenny Rogers, Glam Chops are here to change the world. Imagine a platform boot stamping on a human face – forever. Then imagine the face is Johnny Borrell’s. Or just listen to their brilliant songs here.

>Today’s New Band – Everybody Was In The French Resistance…Now

>Some bands spawn multiple side projects when individual members decide to branch out, like, creatively, maaan. New Order, for example, fractured into not only Electronic, but also Revenge, Freebass – who had three bassists in the band – (three-bass, geddit?), Monaco and The Other Two (who were, erm, the other two left in the band who hadn’t done a side project).

The truely wonderful Art Brut on the other hand, have also spawned a number of side projects, though unusually, all of them seem to have emerged due to the wandering mind of affable frontman Eddie Argos. His blog lists eight bands that he is in – more than enough to create an Eddie Argos Side Project Week here on A New Band A Day, and believe me, such is my admiration for the unlikely Art Brut Lothario, that I seriously toyed with the idea.

However, common sense prevailed, and Everybody Was In The French Resistance…Now alone are today’s new band. Their guiding principles are as entertaining as their tunes – they aim to “correct the mistakes of pop songs past”. Therefore, the super G.I.R.L.F.R.E.N (You Know I’ve Got A) on their MySpace page is a riposte to Avril Lavigne’s recent crud-bucket of a song of a similar name. It is such a happy idea – to take a song in which someone’s been wronged and call in the pop-airstrike to level things out – that it can’t help but work.

Whether you regard this as a merely a slight joke or (hopefully) as good fun blended with yummy tunes, it doesn’t really matter. They don’t care what you think. They’re settling scores in the realms of pop, and your (least) favourite song might be next.

Don’t forget, you can always contact me here at A.N.B.A.D. via email if you have any suggestions for bands you’d like to see featured!