Waves of sad news heralds the start of this week’s Midweek Mixtape; Heavy D, of Heavy D and The Boys fame, has died at the age of only 44.

Worse though, is the news that Donny-Osmond-for-the-new-millennium, Justin Bieber has decided to make one final record before his voice breaks – and that record – oh boy – is a truly execrable cluster of Christmas hits.

“I should be playing in the snow,” croons the millionaire midget, in a brief moment of self-realisation, “but Imma be under tha mistletoe,” he continues, slipping seamlessly back into his teenage-girl-friendly street slang.

Alex James covers Justin with an avalanche of his own choosing.

MIXTAPE:

FIRST: Izabo has made a perfectly acceptable summer pop song, and I’m the massive idiot who’s only publicising it now, just as summer has finished, simply causing listeners to long for warm days and clear skies again.

SECOND: Kenneth Fox lives in Manchester, although not the same one I live in – he’s living a much less drizzly life in the one in New Hampshire. His guitar jangles are endlessly nice – but don’t let that put you off. Cynicism isn’t always useful, you know.

THIRD: Ice Cream Children had a band meeting recently. In it, one member proposed that their latest shouty, clattering, spazz-fest of a song should be called Sodomise. After a brief discussion, they all agreed that this would be the name that would encourage the most radio plays. And so goes the zany world of pop music.

FOURTH: The Cold One Hundred have got it right – at least when it comes to creating the type of music that is more suitable for this time of year. Gloomy but uplifting, grimy and glittery. Luxurious, lovely.