She’s had 36 million views on Youtube . It’ll probably be 38 million by the time you read this. Simon Cowell thinks she’s a genius. She just wants to duet with Justin Bieber.

Rebecca Black is a new kind of hero for our times, one who couldn’t have existed at any other point in history. Armed with one deeply moronic, yet insanely catchy pop song, she’s suddenly gaining more attention than almost everyone else put together.

Drebin’s thretening to give Friday one more spin, so listen to this Midweek Mixtape sharpish, before you start involuntarily singing about how the days of the week all follow one another:

FIRST! Secret Knives are making the kind of delirious, jabbering electronic music that films in the 80s predicted would be made in the future. I’m fairly sure that Marty McFly would have boogied to Black Hole in Back To The Future Part 2, and praise doesn’t get much higher than that.

SECOND! Cor, Naymedici are a jaunty lot, aren’t they? Fiddles, jangling guitars and a bit of ska get thrown in the mix, and out pops the kind of song that causes dancefloors to throw beer and start frugging like crazy. Nice.

THIRD! Ollie Loudon has called this song ‘Old Tape Song’, possibly because it was recorded on an old tape, or maybe because it reminisces about TDK C90’s. Either way, it’s a lovely, waif-like, yearning love song to a human, or a cassette tape.

FOURTH! What happens when an ace Manchester-based, eastern European-derived electro-dance-pop band called Rubika, who sing about ‘Robots in love on the disco floor in super shiny leather,‘ re-record the song as an impassioned piano piece? Cracked brilliance, that’s what.