A New Band A Day 2008-2018

Welcome to ANBAD, which celebrated ten years online in April 2018, and is now “resting.” (I’m still jabbering on about music on my radio show and discussing new bands like, oh, I dunno, The Chats, on Twitter.)

However, ANBAD also has over 1200 posts featuring about 1500 artists. Most are buried deeeeep in the blog, rarely seen by human eyes. This seemed a bit unfair, so I randomised the posts and the ones you see below are yanked arbitrarily from the archive for you to explore.

As with anything this old on the internet, some music plugins, hyperlinks, images, formatting – and, frankly, the writing itself – is broken. But even I will begrudgingly admit that randomly looking at ten years of once-new bands is a fascinating glimpse into a very specific time capsule.

I’m as surprised as anyone that this ridiculous and utterly niche music blog has stumbled around online for a decade, surviving all of my attempts to break it, render it defunct, or let it wither on the vine.  So scroll down and read on – and maybe you’ll find some long-forgotten band from 2009 that you’ll love.


 

Panda Party; Fun/Gloom, Fun/Gloom, Repeat

Of all the disparate topics that occupy far too many column inches on ANBAD – woeful puns; finding new ways to introduce yet another Scandinavian pop band; cramming in tenuous, self-serving links to new blogs about terrible cover versions – pure, simple FUN! is the one that pops up the most.

Fun is great. I love fun. But lots of bands hate it. Fun is not cool. Contrast the number of bands that make fun music with the number of po-faced, serious, yeah? ones. The embarrassing scoreline would read Fun: Beastie Boys circa ‘License To Ill, Serious: Everyone Else, ever.

The two camps are firmly entrenched, and ne’er the twixt shall meet. Well, they do occasionally: enter Panda Party.

Panda Party // Defiance! Protect Me

A song called Defiance! Protect Me and its talk of ‘torture, thunder and gunfire’ and ‘making martyrs’ doesn’t scream jelly, ice-cream and jolly japes, but the music that the sombre lyrics bubble along on does.

Such complex interplay. It sounds like a recipe for something worse than disaster, but astonishingly the band pull it off. The music leaps and frolics, coiling and curdling; the lyrics gaze at the navel – part introspection, part narcissism, partly trying not to giggle along with the glee-filled tune.

But why would you expect anything else, really? The band is called Panda Party, and their songs have exclamation marks in the titles. These are men not to be wholly trusted. A surprising and pleasant end to the week.

www.pandaparty.co.uk

Defiance! Protect Me

Playlounge: A Fraught Experience

Not entirely irrelevant preambling fact: Blue Whales are the loudest thing 0n earth – louder than volcanoes and bombs.

There’s nothing more exhilarating than Big Noise Done Correctly. Every teenager with a Vauxhall Nova and a Bonkers! CD knows that.

But what separates horribly-generic-crunchy-guitar-noise from deftly-assembled-swoon-fuzz-thrash? The truth is that there’s about a cigarette paper’s distance between them, and you can just as easily pop through from one to the other.

So my first listen to Playlounge‘s Orange Friends was a fraught experience, as I battled the tiny voice that kept piping up, “just you wait – it’ll go all Nu-Metal in a moment.” It didn’t. I rejoiced. This is a brilliant song.

Very few songs are this thin, but dense; this basic, but multi-layered; this wildly base, but strangely touching. Even fewer songs manage to be all these things at once.

Orange Friends is weighty, simple, golden, cast-off. It’s so endlessly pleasing and unironic, I could hardly stop smiling.

I think there are only two thrusting young upstarts in Playlounge. Two-man bands seem to have something about them. (Really) Excellent.

MORE: slaylounge.wordpress.com

Lowlakes: Deluxe, Delight

Occasionally, hearing a song will pop me back into the past, like a confused astronaut stumbling into a crack in space-time.

It happened last night, just when I idly chose to listen to Duck Rock, and there, suddenly, I was – back on Lorimer station in Brooklyn, waiting for the L train to take me across to 14th Street and spit me back out into a bright, cold February lunchtime.

Pondering on the cognitive dissonance that arose after linking Malcolm Mclaren’s febrile and endlessly flawed rapping with standing on a cold and austere subway platform is probably a fool’s errand, and yet I wonder if the mental leap occurred precisely because of the quaint ridiculousness of his voice.

And then I wonder: are such individually identifiable voices the key to a band’s ‘pop’. It didn’t hurt the Sex Pistols, or Suede, or Public Enemy, or [insert band with striking vocalist here]. It didn’t even hurt Menswe@r, who, despite a dearth of good songs, had a front man with a voice that reached out of the radio and flicked you on the nose.

Thus, Lowlakes have a good chance of unnerving listeners many years from now: with the added advantage of not only having a singer with a truly arresting voice, but also having the tunes to boot. Bingo!

 

Far be it from me to say that this song may not have been quite so enjoyable without these particularly luxuriant vocals… but there, I said it. Still, who cares when a song caresses its listeners so convincingly and gently? Catch The Breeze seems to almost groom us with sensuality and love/lust. It’s dreamy and glossy and enticing. Submit. Form your own memories.

MORE: soundcloud.com/lowlakes

>Today’s New Band – The Tumbledryer Babies

>Returning back to the UK has been everything I expected, for good and bad. Cold winds, rain, baked beans on toast and football violence. They just don’t do those kind of things as well in continental Europe.

Proper Indie is something else that’s done better here. Wait – that’s not musical xenophobia – there’s loads of great bands abroad, it’s just that Britain seems to lead when it comes to that brand of songs recorded in bedrooms, by bands with unusual names, made up of pasty young men.

Let’s shoehorn Today’s New Band into that category, too. In all honesty, I’m not sure if The Tumbledryer Babies are actually pasty white youths, but it’s a reasonable gamble to assume so. Their songs are pitch-perfect Bedroom Indie – lo-fi and lo-budget; hi-invention and hi-fun. A song that snipes at the unfairly popular trendies: Predictable Teens. A song that celebrates the status of the uncool: Now The Geeks Have A Union.

Tell Me What To Do swivels an ironic eye to the past, nicking an old rock ‘n’ roll bassline, some ‘shoop-shoop’ backing vocals, and a twist on a traditional line – “He hit me and it didn’t really feel like a kiss”. But it’s no dumb pastiche – the song is either a wry glance at bands who slavishly follow a defined path to stardom, or a cute love song – I’m not sure which. I hope it’s the former, but would happily settle for the latter.

Evan Dando’s The Outdoor Type nicely apes and reverses the Lemonheads’ song – “I can’t go away with you on a rock-climbing weekend/What if something’s on TV that’s never on again?” The desire for a lazy, stay-at-home-and-play-records-and-videogames life is shared by plenty. The Tumbledryer Babies have a market to meet their songs, and they deserve to be heard outside of darkened bedrooms across the land. They make simple, natty songs about their simple, natty lives. Listen here!

>Today’s New Band – The Pains of Being Pure At Heart

>Possibly the most idiotic, frustrating thing about rock music right now is its tiresome and seemingly endless ability to create new ‘scenes’ out of old ones. Nostalgia has infected the one thing which, in the wake of punk, would supposedly tear up the past and focus solely on the future. Maybe bands or journalists or radio pluggers or whoever it is that actually makes things happen in the murky depths of rock have lost their nerve waiting for a new, exciting movement to begin and are happy to brand old ideas with the dumb, shiny sheen of a “New-” prefix. Take an undeserved bow, New Rave, New Rock, Nu-Metal and all of your unwanted friends.

Perhaps it’s pop ‘n’ rock music’s innate simplicity (See yesterday’s New Band, The Gravity Crisis, for more guff on this topic) which means that old sounds are endlessly recycled, and really, it’s one of it’s most endearing qualities. Who hasn’t ever thrilled at the moment when a new song you hear reminds you – for a split second – of one of your favourite bands? Well, this happened to me, today, as I was listening to Today’s (superb) New Band, The Pains of Being Pure At Heart.

After only a millisecond of listening to the cracks and explosions of drums and guitar fuzz that is the wonderful Come Saturday, I suddenly had a brain-flash of being 16 again, when I first heard, in quick succession, My Bloody Valentine and Jesus and Mary Chain. This is good nostalgia, the type that leaves you a bit giddy and wide-eyed with joy, and not the sort that is dreamt up by someone with an ironic haircut who’s, you know, getting into this Indie music stuff, yeah?

It would be glib to say that if you like MBV and JAMC, you’ll love The Pains of Being Pure At Heart, but what the hell, it’s true. If you love songs that drive forward with breathless abandon, all fuzzy, warm and colourful as a novelty Christmas sweater, then let yourself swoop head first into their songs. The fact that they have a song about Kurt Cobain’s Cardigan is the cherry on the icing on the frosting on the cake.

The worrying element of The Pains of Being Pure At Heart‘s ace-ness is that they’ll get lumped in with the dregs of the latest music revival – the return of the dreaded Shoegaze (though by now some smug idiot has already termed it “New-Gaze” as they were riding their micro-scooters to work). This would be a travesty and must not happen. Reclaim them as your own, right now, by listening to their fantastic songs on this Myspace page, here!

>Today’s New Band – Sister PLUS! High Yield Commodity Price Movements!

>Seeing as people are getting all stroppy about money now the economy’s plunged down the toilet, solid, tangible and safe things suddenly seem attractive. The price of gold has rocketed again as people realised that their money wasn’t actually safe in, say, those 15 unbuilt city-centre apartments that are now mothballed.

This trait has drifted into rock ‘n roll as well. At this point, allow me to engage in a some very minor name-dropping. I was chatting to the drummer out of Pete and The Pirates (CLANG) the other night, and he was commiserating with me over the excessive ticket price for the gig.

Even the bigger bands, he said, make the vast majority of their money from live gigs as opposed to CD sales now. Thus, the one thing that can’t be bootlegged or put on a torrent site – the live gig, the un-digitisible tangible – is now the safe money maker, just like gold and oil and jewels.

So in times like these, perhaps the good ol’ four-square rock band setup of guitars and drums and bass and singers will have more luck. Thus, invest your time, and money, if you have any left, into Today’s New Band, Sister.

None of their songs depart from a standard rock template, giving singer Gemma a solid grounding to leap from. You won’t need to see any of Sister’s publicity photos to guess that she’s very clearly the focal point, and for a truly valid reason – her vocals are engaging, believable and direct. Taking this straightforward rock starting point and create something that deviates from the norm is tough, but Sister have managed it, carving out songs that are bold, brash and yet sweet and articulate.

And as such, Satellite is heartfelt without descending into melodrama. It sounds pounding and sparse. Lovers of Today pops a large chorus into a song that seemed too fragile to hold it, but it works. Listen to them for yourself, right here, and stop fretting about the money you lost on High Yeild Commodity Price Movements, whatever they are.

ExR (Feat Lady Leshurr) – Song X From Tomorrow

Because ANBAD is so stupidly and relentlessly determined to look in the other direction to everyone else, I often feel just as out of the loop as the majority.

I mean, I think I know what sounds good – but is the The Sound Of Now? And how do you define that?

I think the only real way you can try to get a handle on that is by asking whether Song X sounds like it comes from tomorrow.

And t0morrow, in the world of new music, is as close to being today as you can hope to get.

Thus, ExR – or Etta Bond and Raf Riley to their significant others – have produced Song X, in the form of the inexplicably terrific Boring Bitches.

ExR Feat. Lady Leshurr BORING BITCHES

So while I figure out ways of making this blog less deeply un-zeitgiesty, wallow in the manic brilliance of Boring Bitches: a song that pierces the fabric of not only today’s self-obsessive culture, but also gets to the heart of what’s wrong with it – a total lack of fun.

Boring Bitches represents a high watermark in many respects – it’s a song with a wicked sense of humour, and the sound of the future, all condensed into one pop-culture nugget. Excellent.

MORE: emergency-room.co.uk

NB: Another rarity – here is the video to accompany Boring Bitches, which is far too brilliant to ignore:

>Today’s New Band – Glam Chops

>Mixing things together is one of those childlike pleasures that never leaves us as we’re drawn, inexorably, towards adulthood. Presented with a table of food, what child doesn’t think, “I wonder what happens if I stir that gravy into that ketchup/mashed potatoes/custard and then taste it?” It seems like only a whole load of good can come from dedicated investigating like this. The truth is somewhat harder to swallow, literally and metophorically, and surely the real reason for the glut of knuckle-chewingly idiotic ‘mash-ups’ that polluted the internet a while ago.

In the non-gravy laden world of rock ‘n’ roll, what happens when two rock asteroids collide? Again, mixed results inevitably ensue. For every wonderful Fairytale of New York, there’s a brain-auto-euthanasia-ing Ebony and Ivory. These collaborations should be approached with extreme caution, or dodged altogether, just in case.

Today’s New Band, Glam Chops, is a meeting of, amongst others, Eddie Argos and David Devant from the lovely Art Brut and the delicious David Devant and His Spirit Wife. Surely nothing can go wrong?

Well, no, nothing can go wrong. Yes, it’s Glam Rock, and no, it’s not changed that much since the 70’s – but that’s only a good thing. Glam Chops lovingly revisit the past, but unlike Marty McFly, don’t muck around with it. Don’t Be Glum Be Glam is just pure, mindless fun – the best kind of all. HUGE guitars, HUGER choruses and chant-along verses VAST enough to climb on and lever the earth out of orbit.

In The Lord Is A Man of War, Glam Chops, frankly, push the basic tenets of glam to it’s mentalist conclusions, with a monster reverb-spazzed guitar solo and guitars so crunchy that they’ve probably been constructed purely from Tortilla Chips.

More fun than hot oil wrestling, more catchy than the airborn Ebola virus from Outbreak and more out of sync with today’s po-faced haircut-rock posturing than Kenny Rogers, Glam Chops are here to change the world. Imagine a platform boot stamping on a human face – forever. Then imagine the face is Johnny Borrell’s. Or just listen to their brilliant songs here.

GUEST POST // A Ticket-Seller’s Tips

FYI: ANBAD is away for a few days R&R, and will return refreshed next week. That’s three Initialisms in one sentence, BTW. Wait – four. FTW!

ANBAD spends most of its time blah-ing about very new bands that make no money from their passion, but who do it in the hope that one day they will. When they do, they’ll make most of it from live ticket sales – the one side of the music industry that actually makes any money now.

Suddenly, tickets sellers are richer than ever – and to keep the swimming pools on their yachts filled with Champagne and Page 3 girls, they need to spot the forthcoming acts that you, the cash-happy public will blow money on. But which new bands will make that leap to profitability?

ANBAD asked Callie Morris, web editor on ticketing website Aloud.com to explain who she anticipated would straddle the thin line between credibility and profitability in 2011.

It’s an interesting read – the choices vary from the genuinely exciting to the more obvious picks, but here you will learn which acts will definitely make the transition from part-timers to social-climbers. And yes, there are lots of plugs for Aloud.com…

Jamie Woon

Jamie Woon has put his own electro-acoustic spin on soul, alternative rock and textured guitar riffs, creating himself his very own cheeky little genre which is all set to dominate in 2011.

After the release of his single ‘Night Air’ in 2010 he began to make his mark on the industry, with two new members both named Dan on bass and drums to add even more depth to his performances.

SHAMELESS PLUG #1: Jamie Woon tickets at Aloud.com.

James Blake

You will probably most likely know of James Blake due to the immense critical acclaim he received for his version of ‘Limit to Your Love’ by Feist in 2010. This cover with his unique and abstract take on dubstep was named ‘Hottest Record in the World’ by Zane Lowe and just added to the admiration surrounding him by various Radio DJs.

With this extra air-play and his debut self-titled album set for a February release he is definitely one to watch out for in 2011. He will be appearing at the ‘Next Big Thing’ event in London.

SHAMELESS PLUG #2: Aloud.com for tickets.

Janelle Monae

Although quirky Janelle Monae has been releasing the odd single for a few years, it is only with the 2010 release of her debut album The ArchAndroid (Suites II and III) that she has really started to cause a stir.

Janelle Monae is undoubtedly going to be huge in 2011. Likened to artists such as OutKast and Funkadelic, her infectious music and performances bursting with attitude and energy have already gained her a massive following of fans.

SHAMELESS PLUG #3: Janelle Monae tickets

Wretch 32

New don of hip hop Wretch 32 has just released his first single ‘Traktor’ and is already seeing widespread recognition for his vast vocal talents. The grime MC and rapper was snapped up by Ministry of Sound records in 2010 and is set to release his debut album later on in 2011.

There’s certainly a lot more to come from Wretch 32, he will be appearing at ‘Next Big Thing’ in February before heading off on an extensive UK tour with Example.

SHAMELESS PLUG #4: Aloud.com for tickets

Mona

New US band Mona has been compared to the likes of The Strokes and Kings of Leon. Their attitude on stage and obvious enthusiasm for their performances ensure that they have created their own little place in the industry reeling in the crowds to sell-out gigs.

Security even had to get involved at their debut show in Camden in 2010 after too many people tried to enter the venue – good a proof as any that they are set to go far in 2011… although hopefully at bigger venues.

SHAMELESS PLUG #5: Aloud.com

INTERVIEW // Golau Glau

This is an interview designed specifically not to eke away at the carefully constructed WALL OF MYSTERY that surrounds the Golau Glau collective.They originally contacted ANBAD with an email consisting of carefully constructed confusion, and we’ve been hooked ever since. Here, they (whoever ‘they’ are) charmingly bat away our quasi-probing questions…

Hi Golau Glau! How are you? Where are you in the world right now? What do you see? And what is good about that place?

We are in GG Towers in the UK, an international HQ for mystique and oompah.

Naturally, we’re all wondering why there’s such secrecy. Is one of you Pete Townshend? (That’s the last identity-probing question, promise)

We are just shy and want it to be about nothing but the music. None of us wrote Baba O’Riley and none of us own credit cards.

I wondered endlessly about your statement, “We like Wales and cats, and whales, but not Cats”. Why does Cats – the musical – specifically, rile you? Is there a terribly traumatic amateur dramatics story to share with us?

If you’ve never heard a nine year old girl or Susan Boyle wail ‘Memory’, you are lucky. The TS Eliot poems are much better, though not his best work.

Golau Glau operates as a collective. How does this work How does your co-operative group nature affect the making of your songs?

We are based in GG Towers, which may or may not take physical form. Things happen there, it’s best not to discuss most of it. You get what you’re given.

Will the anonymity mean that there will  be no live performances? If not, is this considered a shame or a relief?

It means there are no live performances planned, until we can have stripy holograms do it for us. It is a relief.

Anonymity leaves you and your music very open to the listener’s  interpretation. It reminded me of the pre-internet days when you’d hear a song once on the radio and then endlessly puzzle about it until it appeared again. Is this part of the reasoning behind your stance?

This is correct. We are shy, but we also miss not knowing everything and the days of proper glamour rather than cheap celebrity.

Do you think that the exposure that the internet brings to bands has some negative aspects as well as the well-publicised positives?

Yes. You’re only new and interesting for a fortnight and there’s too much music out there. Like with television, there was always a lot of rubbish but now it has multiplied.

Finally, where would you like to head – what are your ambitions?

Tokyo DisneySea, Sonar festival, Paula Abdul’s video for Opposites Attract and down the dumper. Vinyl is nice.

Worthless BONUS Question: If you could meet any musical hero, who would it be, what one question would you ask them, and what drink would you buy them?

Most of them are dead, and we’re polite enough to ask those who remain what they’d prefer. Heroes usually disappoint – they’re either lovely and normal or…not. The magic remains in our heads, where it should be.

So: they’re not The Who, they want to go to Japanese theme parks, and dislike Susan Boyle. Which means they could be just about anyone. Why not buy their brilliant songs to see if you can figure it out for yourself?

www.myspace.com/golauglau